Resourceful Rat/Dialogue

Text Colour Key
grey	This text provides context for interactions, and is not part of any original quote.
cyan	This text represents a variable value that may change depending on the character being played, or the player's settings.
orange	This text represents player dialogue choices. Regular text under orange text indicates a dialogue branch initiated by that choice.
Hover over each icon to see what it represents.

The collected dialogue of the Resourceful Rat. This page also contains the table of Insults, which while not exclusively used by the Resourceful Rat, are primarily utilised in his dialogue.

Insults
chump dope loser dork nerd noodle ***** punk flunky @#$%$ rat fink oaf jerk choffer

Thief NPC
(After being shot) Hey, watch it! *****!! Jerk!

Shortcut Merchant
(Interacting for the first time on a save file) So, you like takin' shortcuts, huh? Well just for you, I've opened up a new franchise. Ya know, for bein' such a good... customer. Got some "special offers" lined up for you. Just in case you came down here... a little unprepared. Can't have my favorite customer poorly equipped.
(Interacting) Go on, take one.
(Interacting again) That's a nice gun. Shame if somethin' happened to it. Thievery is just another form of shortcut. You'd be surprised at what some people just leave lyin' around. Watch out for all the Bullats. You sure found some interestin' stuff last time... Adventurers sure are good at findin' treasure. Not too good at keepin' it, though.
(Interacting for the third time onwards) Take care... heh heh heh. Watch your step...
(After being shot) Hey, watch it! *****!! Jerk!
(After the player has finished taking their guns) Fine choice. Enjoy. That one?
(Before disappearing) Later, Random Insult! Later, Player Nickname! Fufufufufu!

Boss
(Entering the Boss Room with no Infuriating Notes for the first time) What!? How did you find me? You are either exceedingly lucky or some kind of hacker!
(Entering the Boss Room with three or fewer Infuriating Notes) Hmmm. It's statistically unlikely that you got here reading so few notes. I think you might have cheated... but I can't be sure. So I'll just have to kill you! Are you brute-forcing your way through my immaculately designed maze? That makes me angry! DIE! Go appreciate my poetry! You aren't supposed to be here yet! Grawr!
(Entering the Boss Room with four Infuriating Notes for the first time) Here with only 4 notes... how resourceful. But there can only be one! Die, usurper!
(Entering the Boss Room with five Infuriating Notes for the first time) Here you are. I can't blame you for getting impatient... who wouldn't want a slice of this?
(Entering the Boss Room with all Infuriating Notes for the first time) You have wedged yourself in here, but now you're trapped like a rat! You've been grating my nerves since you got here. But now you'll face me: The Big Cheese!
(Entering the Boss Room with all Infuriating Notes a second time) You followed the trail of cheese through the maze! Congratulations! Here's your reward! Fufufufufufufu.
(Entering the Boss Room after dying to the rat last attempt) Back with your tail between your legs, I see. I'll make you full of holes... again! Fufufufufu. Your tenacity is remarkable. It will be your end! Something stinks... oh, it's you again.
(Entering the Boss Room after defeating the rat last attempt) I was just getting warmed up before, now I'll melt you! It seems we were destined to do this over and over again! Die, usurper!
(After defeating the Rat in Punch Out) Come hither, Character Nickname.
(After being shot once defeated in Punch Out, before being interacted with) Have mercy! Yield! Let me tell you my life's story, damnit!
(Interacting after defeating the Rat in Punch Out) Pity me, for my story is a tragedy. I was born in the hold of a tradesman's ship, where my mischief made our nest among the refuse. When the tradesman changed routes, the food they previously hauled was replaced with weaponry. I watched my brothers and sisters starve, though I vowed to protect them. So I learned to steal, from the captain's personal stores. It was sadly... not enough. My efforts to feed them only prolonged their suffering. I couldn't steal enough; it became an obsession. I knew that the end was coming. Eventually, driven mad with hunger, my mischief turned on each other. The weakest went first, but soon, the last of my kin were gone, eaten by their brethren. When the trader finally docked, I escaped his ship... and found myself here, trapped in time. I have clawed a home here from nothing. My own kingdom. But here I lie, cut down by a usurper with the pettiest of intent. Revenge? You do not know pain.. I have one last thing to ask... Take off your mask, so that I may see your face with my own eyes. ... Oh. That's... actually your face. Ha! I realize now... It seems... I never knew... True tragedy.